Oh, Hitler.

Warning: please take the following entry with a grain of salt. All statements made in jest.

There is a thing I say, and most people do not know the story behind this thing that I say. I have decided to tell this story, because sometimes when I say it, things can get a bit sticky if people don't know why I said it.

*sounds of throat clearing*

So one day, my friends Bora and Imp were walking through a bookstore. They passed a book about Hitler, and Bora said, "Oh, Hitler." And then Imp says, "Why'd ya do it?" And it was funny. So they brought it into everyday conversation. Over time, the statement evolved to, "Oh, [insert name here], why'd ya do it?" And then finally just, "Oh, [insert name here]." We throw Hitler in there every once in awhile for fun.

Ok, that's my story. Or explanation. Or something.

Nothing better than a little good conversation. Except a lot of it.

I'm home for a long weekend this weekend. So far, it's been really nice.

I got my teeth cleaned and then chauffeured mi madre around for her annual MRI and consult appointments.

I also got a chance to hang out with Gemini Thing for about an hour. It was nice because we thought we weren't going to be able to see each other until tomorrow. We've been talking quite a bit lately, and we'd finally made plans to hang out. It turned out that we both had a bit of time today, so we met up. Very enjoyable. Oh, also, apparently Lost has been giving her crap because Gem "can" talk to me and hang out with me, and she "can't." Or something like that. I'm just kind of like, "Who made up those rules? Where did they even come from?" I am getting a bit of twisted pleasure out of the whole thing though....

I'm seeing Lost for a bit tomorrow night, so....I might have a story. Maybe. I kind of hope not, though.

All day today, Lexi was in the front of my mind. I just felt that today would have been a great day to share with her. In person, that is. I have days like that sometimes. I'm going about my day, doing whatever, and I just feel that it would be perfect if some person were there to do it all with me. Today it was Lexi. Actually, it is often Lexi. In other news, we had an awesome conversation online last night:

"Ha, a whole house to the two of us....for two weeks....we could get in to so much trouble..."

Hee hee. I can't wait. Look out, Utah!

Ok, so anyway. After hanging out with Gem, I went to see my favorite Cuban friend, FridgeBoy. Well, I wanted to see Cherchante, and Mama and Papa Khan, too. More good times. I love that house (not to mention that family). FB and I (<-- LoL! Get it? Ha!) went on a reeeeeally long walk around that one lake, with our usual special twist to it. It was just like old times. Just like old times except the conversation was slightly....older? I'm not sure how to put it. It was great, though. I love that kid. He'll be 17 on Sunday! I can't even believe it. *sigh* All of "my kids" are growing up. But that, my friends, is a story for another day. Or you know, never. I'm not sure yet.

Ok, The End.

I think I like it.

I fell asleep the other night with my own song stuck in my head. I kinda liked it.

I'm not sure if it's any good yet, but it felt really good to get those few lines worked out.

If you don't have anything good to write, don't write anything at all.

' Twas my motto for this blog....hmm......and yet, I write.


I'm confused.

I don't know what is going on in Lost's head. I really wish I did. I'm frustrated because I find myself talking to her, slipping right back into the rhythm that existed so naturally between us. "It's weird because it's not weird." I don't know yet if I can trust her. Should I embrace the returning friendship, or attempt to keep up some wall...if that's even possible? I've let down my defenses so easily so far. We'd been so close.

And then there's the other one... *sigh* I don't know what's going on.

Being at home this weekend will be nice. I'm pretty sure....

"And the forecast, I know, is that I'll be depressed."

I put myself back on meds this morning. There are so many things going on right now. I can't keep it all straight. Or something. I don't know what's going on inside my head--inside of me. I'm trying to handle it but I don't know how well I'm actually doing.

I've lost the hope I had begun to feel. I've lost my calm. I'm back in the spiraling black abyss that is the other part of my mind.

I'll just have to see what comes of it all....

"But I'll wait outside,

hopin' that I'll catch sight of the sun..."